I'm 38 weeks pregnant today. For those who don't know/remember, this is a big day in pregnancy for me. It was the last gestational day that Cora was alive, and therefore the day that we induced with Erin. But, as per my desire to go into labor on my own this time....I'm still pregnant. I have to admit my morning was hard. My dad tells me "not to dwell" on it, but that isn't all that easily done. I found myself thinking a lot about those 38 weeks I had with Cora, and how grateful I am for them. I am so amazingly grateful to not just believe that I will get her back, but to know with every fiber of my soul that one day my family will be whole and that she will be reunited with us.
So right now, I'm as pregnant as I have ever been. I can't help but feel afraid for tonight and tomorrow morning. I went to sleep with my baby alive and kicking. I woke up with her gone. I know that this is a different pregnancy and that I'm not guaranteed the same outcome, but I'm still freaked out. So...prayers for my sanity would be appreciated. And prayers that if Patrick isn't born tonight, he WON'T come until next Monday. (Danica, my friend who is taking Erin for me, will be out of town from Wed.-Sun. for her sister's wedding, and Matt will be out of town from Fri.-Sun. for his grandfather's funeral.)
Okay, so here's a couple pictures:
Me
The reason I shouldn't let Erin watch Madagascar while she's supposed to be eating breakfast. If you can't tell, she's just holding the spoon above her bowl. She so enthralled in the movie she's not eating. lol.
And on to the attack of the Monday Fairy...
I went out to do some shopping today, buying last minute needed things for baby and some stuff for Erin and a couple things for me...but decided to stop at Taco Bell for lunch first. I ordered a #9 combo (crunchwrap supreme), chicken and no lettuce on the cruncy taco (since Erin will just make a mess). She asked me, "both supreme?" I said "Yes," a little confused. I didn't know that they made crunchy tacos in supreme, but didn't think much of it. So she gives me my cup and my food comes up and it's 2 gorditas. What?
She had programmed in #6 instead of #9 (now doesn't this sound like something I would do??) So we got it all cleared up, and she had to refund me $2.30, but I had my food, and all was good. I had my tray with my crunchwrap, Erin's taco, and my drink, and I was holding Erin's hand as we found a seat. I found a good place, and set my tray down, and watched in horror as my drink sloooooooooowlllllllllllly tipped over, all over the bench (nearly soaking the guy on the other end) and the floor! OH MAN! So I had about 5 people handing me napkins, and when I went over to tell the lady what I had done, she couldn't help but laugh. She also had issues with the mop bucket while she was mopping (the squeezy thing kept coming off the side of the bucket), so we both agreed we'd been hit by the Monday Fairy.
Apologies….
1 month ago
5 comments:
I guess one good thing is that there's no school today, not that you'd be going to school anyway...
this too shall pass. Oh and we're praying for you and Patrick.
Ahh the good 'ol Monday Fairy! Yes, you, Patrick, Matt and even Erin are in my prayers. Always, love.
First of all, you look amazingly beautiful pregnant! Oh how I long for that look again! You are so brave. It must take a lot of courage and faith to let yourself go past "the day". I feel like I will always want to be induced so I don't have to face more of that fear than needful...perhaps my perspective on that will change with time too. I will keep you and your little one in our prayers as I'm sure it can be very stressful at times. Can't wait to hear all about and see photos of the baby when it arrives!
Huggles! You look beautiful! I love the testimony that you have of the sealing power. It is an amazing feeling.
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