And then she was SO EXCITED about blowing out the candles
Apologies….
1 year ago
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
Erin's birthday adventures.
Yesterday, we rode the train downtown to have lunch with Daddy. Erin loves trains and is continually talking about them.
We walked down 16th street.
We asked her what she wanted for lunch, and she asked for hotdogs. So off to Biker Jim's Gourmet Hotdogs stand we went. It was fun to get lunch at a sidewalk hotdog stand. It made me feel like a Big City person. lol Biker Jim's dogs truly were gourmet. They had lots of different kinds. I had the Alaskan Reindeer (good, but not really like anything else I've had), Matt had the wild boar bratwurst, and Erin and Patrick shared a kosher all-beef hotdog.
Afterwards we went to get some fat-free frozen yogurt. I've never been a fan of frozen yogurt, but Matt told me I HAD to try this place. It's called Kuulture, and it's only location is here in Denver (though they're looking to franchise). And it was GOOD.
By the time we got home, both babies were sleeping
When dad got home we decided to go swimming, since it was hot and Erin loves swimming.
Erin's got a little vest that's supposed to help teach her how to float
And Patrick's got a penguin floaty. I couldn't help myself. I thought Aunt Adi would appreciate it.
When we came back, they watched a movie while I cooked dinner and decorated the cake
Erin wanted to open presents first
And then she was SO EXCITED about blowing out the candles
It was very yummy
And then she was SO EXCITED about blowing out the candles
Monday, June 7, 2010
The birth of Erin Rielle
Three years ago today I was in labor. Actually, my clock says 8:42 and Erin was born at 8:48, so I was almost done with labor.
But Erin's birth story began on June 6th. I went in for my once-a-week OB appointment. My doctors (there were 3 in the practice) and I had already agreed that I would be induced on June 7th, at 38 weeks, since Cora died at 38weeks and 1 day, and I just couldn't handle the idea of going over that again. Since 38 weeks is full term, they agreed (but insisted on no earlier. Since I insisted on no later, there was only one day to choose from).
At that OB appointment, I was checked to see if my body was at a "favorable" point to be induced. It wasn't. I think I must have had a wild panicked look in my eyes because he was very quick to reassure me that there were still things that they could do, I would just have to go to the hospital that night instead of the next morning like I was scheduled. It was SUCH a relief to know that I wouldn't have to make it through another night wondering if I was going to wake up to an unmoving baby.
It was about 2pm and I was scheduled to go to the hospital at 8pm. So we went home, and leisurely got things together. We made sure that we had several outfits for Erin, the carseat, all the things I would need (like SOCKS! My feet FREEZE when I'm in labor apparently!).
It was good to be excited for labor. With Cora I was understandably dreading being induced, but the fact that Erin was kicking me very hard in the ribs still was AMAZING. I was so excited to meet her.
We went to Bajio for dinner, since it would be my last meal for a while. I think we had the nachos. We shared a plate but it was still a LOT of food. Probably not the best of ideas, actually.
We wandered up to the hospital, got there a little early, checked in, did all the paperwork. I was placed in a room and got changed and they tried to get an IV in....she got it on her second try, which is good for me, but it hurt if it wasn't just so so she spent 45 minutes taping it into place, and I still really couldn't move much. By that time it was 9pm, and the doctor who had seen me that afternoon was the one on call for the night, so he stopped in to check and see how I was doing. No change from that afternoon so they decided to place a foley catheter. A foley is basically a water balloon that fills to 2-3cm and dilates the cervix. I needed to be dilated to at least 2cm before they could start pitocin.
After the foley was placed (OW!!!), they gave me some ambien because, in the words of the nurse, "It'll make you pretty crampy and you're going to need your sleep." I fell asleep to the sound of Erin's heartbeat on the monitor. So reassuring.
Sometime between 1 am and 4 am (I'm thinking 2:30? can't really remember) I woke up and threw up all over the floor beside my bed. I still feel bad for my night nurse! When I called her, her response was a big sigh and "okay, I'll be right there." I wonder how often that happens.
At 4am she came in to check me and see how the foley was doing. To her surprise I was already dilated to 4cm and pretty thin, so she called Dr. Crouch and he gave her the okay to start the pitocin. I fell back to sleep.
Around 6:30 I woke up in pain. By 7am it was bad enough I decided I couldn't go through it alone and needed to wake Matt up. I remember yelling at him, but he says I was barely making any noise. Strange that one. Anyway, I was in a LOT of pain, and when the nurse came in she checked me. 7cm (yes, that makes it easy to remember, 4cm by 4am, 7cm by 7am), and I asked for an epidural. She started paging the on anesthesiologist on duty until the day shift came in. Unfortunately he was downstairs with my friend's 2-year-old son who was getting his tonsils and adenoids out and tubes put in his ears. That's the only reason I can forgive him his tardiness. He finally showed up at 8am, but got the epi in on the first try and pretty quickly.
I honestly don't remember them checking me again. Just suddenly the doctor was getting all his gear on and the nurses were bringing in tables. I vividly remember asking "Oh, are we ready already?" I was expecting it to still be a while. I pushed for 2 hours with Cora after all. But Erin was alive and helping and not wrapped up in her cord, so 15 minutes later there she was.
It's hard to describe how I felt at that moment. Relief was probably the dominant emotion. Relief that she was alive. I guess the only people who can really appreciate that are those who have delivered dead babies, but....I was so relieved. It wouldn't be another nightmare. Shock was the next biggest one. Was she really here? I really had a baby? What had I gotten myself into?
Joy came. And awe. I was in awe that I had made this perfect little person. I'm still in awe, actually. It's been 3 years and sometimes I still look at her and wonder where she came from.
In the baby loss community we call a baby who is born after a loss a "rainbow" baby, because rainbows bring color back into the world after a storm. And Erin certainly does that. There have been tears of frustration and pain, but even then, I'm so glad to have them. She brings such joy into my life.
Happy birthday baby girl. I love you.
But Erin's birth story began on June 6th. I went in for my once-a-week OB appointment. My doctors (there were 3 in the practice) and I had already agreed that I would be induced on June 7th, at 38 weeks, since Cora died at 38weeks and 1 day, and I just couldn't handle the idea of going over that again. Since 38 weeks is full term, they agreed (but insisted on no earlier. Since I insisted on no later, there was only one day to choose from).
At that OB appointment, I was checked to see if my body was at a "favorable" point to be induced. It wasn't. I think I must have had a wild panicked look in my eyes because he was very quick to reassure me that there were still things that they could do, I would just have to go to the hospital that night instead of the next morning like I was scheduled. It was SUCH a relief to know that I wouldn't have to make it through another night wondering if I was going to wake up to an unmoving baby.
It was about 2pm and I was scheduled to go to the hospital at 8pm. So we went home, and leisurely got things together. We made sure that we had several outfits for Erin, the carseat, all the things I would need (like SOCKS! My feet FREEZE when I'm in labor apparently!).
It was good to be excited for labor. With Cora I was understandably dreading being induced, but the fact that Erin was kicking me very hard in the ribs still was AMAZING. I was so excited to meet her.
We went to Bajio for dinner, since it would be my last meal for a while. I think we had the nachos. We shared a plate but it was still a LOT of food. Probably not the best of ideas, actually.
We wandered up to the hospital, got there a little early, checked in, did all the paperwork. I was placed in a room and got changed and they tried to get an IV in....she got it on her second try, which is good for me, but it hurt if it wasn't just so so she spent 45 minutes taping it into place, and I still really couldn't move much. By that time it was 9pm, and the doctor who had seen me that afternoon was the one on call for the night, so he stopped in to check and see how I was doing. No change from that afternoon so they decided to place a foley catheter. A foley is basically a water balloon that fills to 2-3cm and dilates the cervix. I needed to be dilated to at least 2cm before they could start pitocin.
After the foley was placed (OW!!!), they gave me some ambien because, in the words of the nurse, "It'll make you pretty crampy and you're going to need your sleep." I fell asleep to the sound of Erin's heartbeat on the monitor. So reassuring.
Sometime between 1 am and 4 am (I'm thinking 2:30? can't really remember) I woke up and threw up all over the floor beside my bed. I still feel bad for my night nurse! When I called her, her response was a big sigh and "okay, I'll be right there." I wonder how often that happens.
At 4am she came in to check me and see how the foley was doing. To her surprise I was already dilated to 4cm and pretty thin, so she called Dr. Crouch and he gave her the okay to start the pitocin. I fell back to sleep.
Around 6:30 I woke up in pain. By 7am it was bad enough I decided I couldn't go through it alone and needed to wake Matt up. I remember yelling at him, but he says I was barely making any noise. Strange that one. Anyway, I was in a LOT of pain, and when the nurse came in she checked me. 7cm (yes, that makes it easy to remember, 4cm by 4am, 7cm by 7am), and I asked for an epidural. She started paging the on anesthesiologist on duty until the day shift came in. Unfortunately he was downstairs with my friend's 2-year-old son who was getting his tonsils and adenoids out and tubes put in his ears. That's the only reason I can forgive him his tardiness. He finally showed up at 8am, but got the epi in on the first try and pretty quickly.
I honestly don't remember them checking me again. Just suddenly the doctor was getting all his gear on and the nurses were bringing in tables. I vividly remember asking "Oh, are we ready already?" I was expecting it to still be a while. I pushed for 2 hours with Cora after all. But Erin was alive and helping and not wrapped up in her cord, so 15 minutes later there she was.
It's hard to describe how I felt at that moment. Relief was probably the dominant emotion. Relief that she was alive. I guess the only people who can really appreciate that are those who have delivered dead babies, but....I was so relieved. It wouldn't be another nightmare. Shock was the next biggest one. Was she really here? I really had a baby? What had I gotten myself into?
Joy came. And awe. I was in awe that I had made this perfect little person. I'm still in awe, actually. It's been 3 years and sometimes I still look at her and wonder where she came from.
In the baby loss community we call a baby who is born after a loss a "rainbow" baby, because rainbows bring color back into the world after a storm. And Erin certainly does that. There have been tears of frustration and pain, but even then, I'm so glad to have them. She brings such joy into my life.
Happy birthday baby girl. I love you.
It's 1:41 am...
...and I just put Erin back to bed. She's thrown up 3 times so far, hopefully she won't again. Ugh. I'm waiting on the washer to finish so I can put everything she threw up on the first time in the dryer.
I smell gross...
I smell gross...
Friday, June 4, 2010
While Patrick sleeps
Patrick passed out during lunch
So Erin and I went outside for a few minutes to color on the sidewalk
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Patrick's vocabulary
My little guy has suddenly started talking more and more lately.
He says "Mom" and "Dada" and "up" all the time. He says "yay" a lot too, usually accompanied by clapping his hands. He occasionally says "hi," too.
Monday was a breakthough day for him. I've been asking him to say "please" lately, and on Monday when I asked him to, every time he answered "tssssssss." On Tuesday and on Wednesday he brought me his bottle or cup, handed them to me and said "tsssss" without me prompting him. So...I accept that.
Also on Monday, I realized he counts. I was carrying Patrick on my left hip, and Erin had my right hand and Matt by the hand. We were counting to 3 and swinging her up. After we were done, Patrick started saying "Oooooo-uh, doooo, DEEE!" He's done it several times since then, and will sometimes continue when you start with one.
It's amazing how much faster he's getting this!
He says "Mom" and "Dada" and "up" all the time. He says "yay" a lot too, usually accompanied by clapping his hands. He occasionally says "hi," too.
Monday was a breakthough day for him. I've been asking him to say "please" lately, and on Monday when I asked him to, every time he answered "tssssssss." On Tuesday and on Wednesday he brought me his bottle or cup, handed them to me and said "tsssss" without me prompting him. So...I accept that.
Also on Monday, I realized he counts. I was carrying Patrick on my left hip, and Erin had my right hand and Matt by the hand. We were counting to 3 and swinging her up. After we were done, Patrick started saying "Oooooo-uh, doooo, DEEE!" He's done it several times since then, and will sometimes continue when you start with one.
It's amazing how much faster he's getting this!
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Rocky Mountain National Park
We spent yesterday at Rocky Mountain National Park. It wasn't as spectacular or Yellowstone or the Tetons, but it was still really fun and pretty.
We stopped at Super Target on the way out to get some jelly (I had forgotten to buy it earlier) and got some bagels. Patrick loved it.
On the way out, pretty purple little wildflowers
The little town of Estes Park, the RMNP analog to Jackson
Totally wanted to stop for some of those Homemade ice cream fudge candies. There were 2 other shops directly across the street
Jesus on the hillside...
Interesting scenery
Finally, the park entrance! Felt like everyone else in Colorado had the same idea we did!
Sheep grazing alongside Sheep Lake. Sorry about the bad pic
Fingerling mountains
LOVE this shade of green!
Stopped at the Moraine Park visitor's center. Erin got to be and earthquake and they both petted a beaver.
That ridge is the moraine. A moraine is the pile of rubble left behind in the wake of a moving glacier
Pretty little river
Stopped at Sprague Lake for lunch. Patrick was asleep when we arrived, so I just laid him on the table.
I was then mortified to realize I had grabbed the tartar sauce instead of the mayo.
Patrick woke up and had to have something to eat too.
And then we did a little exploring
We decided to take the 1/2 mile walk around Sprague Lake
this is my favorite of me
And my favorite of Patrick
Looking for fish in the water
We think they were rainbow trout
Mountains and sky on the way to Bear Lake (TOTALLY confused me...this is not the Bear Lake on the Utah-Idaho Border. This is another one)
Bear Lake...both kids trying to get away from me
Still mostly frozen over, but it wasn't that cold
Stopped for a horseback tour. I'd love to take one of these!
More mountains on the way out
ELK! I finally felt like I was in a national park! Too much time in Yellowstone...lol
We stopped at Super Target on the way out to get some jelly (I had forgotten to buy it earlier) and got some bagels. Patrick loved it.
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